I've had a bit of a mixed bag over the last couple of weeks. I've been really down, a couple of anxiety attacks meaning that I had to walk out from my office with my eyes welling up five minutes before a meeting last week and I've been back on my Validispert herbal tablets again. The reasons I won't go into just yet. I have not worked then through my head properly yet... (But please don't panic - it's nothing bad)
The fasle hope in the title comes from last Thursday. I had just finished my weekly run with colleagues and called Mrs Stace to let her know that I had left and would be home in an hour or so.
She told me that there was a letter from the VU (the hospital where the gender clinic is based) so we assumed it was the date for my first appointment. Hope.
Then the panic started about what this means for my life (is this normal?). It made for a not very pleasent drive home.
I got in picked up the letter and looked at it for a while, Mrs Stace asked what was wrong, I told her I was panicing a little. Eventually opened it and found out that it wasn't the appointment after all. (False Hope then).
They are having a lecture on the details of the treatment, and it was an invitation for me (and family & friends) to go and see what the process involes. From first appointment through to after GRS care.
Me and Mrs Stace are going, I don't think we'll be taking the family along. Mrs Stace is concerned because it covers the whole process - which is not my aim at present. But we've discussed it and seeing as whether I go down the path or not it's useful information, and the first phase is something that will affect me no matter what.
The validations... Phone calls again. But I was over the moon - it really picked me up yesterday.
I had to call UPS as they have messed up the invoice of sending my amp back to Cyrus - and it's now (incorrectly) in the financial system of my employer...
I called them, got into a bit of a heated discussion and kept being told 'Calm down madam' by the person on the other end of the phone :) Even when I was quite angry... Mrs Stace thought that I would get too distracted by being happy with the 'madam' to keep focused on why I was angry with them, but I managed it ;p
And the other... I have to have a medical check-up to transfer my UK license to an NL one, as the UK license from the 90's has a whole bunch of interesting categories that you have to take seperate tests for in Holland - complete with regular medicals. So I called the 'Arbo' doctors who can do the test, gave them my name and address (gender was never asked) and recieved a letter yesterday that started with 'Dear Mrs' (Well 'mevrouw' - but close enough).
(Oh, and for Leslie - my current ear worm is 'The Blue Danube' from the 1987 Vienna New Years Concert)