Well two posts in one week...
Thanks to all the advice from Saturdays post, I did think long and hard about how / if I should tell her and had *started* to work out a plan. Unfortunately my body decided to get in the way...
About 11pm last night in bed I had quite a panic attack, by my estimation my heartbeat got to the 120 plus stage, I couldn't lie still and started to have issues breathing - when that happened earlier in the year I ended up in A&E being pumped full of Valium so that I could breath again, and off of work for a week to get over the effects of said Valium.
She asked what was wrong, I told her. Everything.
So far she has been great, I am just terrified of if that changes.
She is wonderful, and everything to me - and I hope that she knows how much I love her.
When the details of last night are less murky in my head (only managed two hours of sleep last night) I may elaborate on this cryptic post. But I think I have to get them right first.
Again thanks to all for your support as well.
Appologies for the poorly structured post.