Tuesday, 23 October 2012

Damn documentation

I’ve been procrastinating about the last Dutch document change recently.  Not because I don’t want to do it, but just because there is so much else going on that it was always “I’ll get around to it”.  Well, I almost got around to it last weekend (I know what I have to do now, just have to buy an envelope - well many, but that is a different story! - to do it).

One thing that struck me was a link to the Gender Recognition Panel, something that will come in a few years so I thought I would take a look and see if there was anything there that would come in useful in the future.  Well…  What I found is that I hope to be Dutch before I need their help!

You see, the UK is a little backwards in its attitude to marriage as far as I am concerned.  In that it’s a man and a woman and nothing else. Now I can see that churches complain and say that they do not want to have to perform same sex marriages as it goes against their teachings.  Honestly I couldn’t care less, I do not want to force the churches to do anything – that’s internal housekeeping as far as I am concerned; as long as they are not teaching hate (that makes my blood boil!).

But there is no reason why you should not be able to get married in a registry office to whomever you wish (as long as you are both of age, and both consenting).  That has zero impact on religion – I have never understood how one person’s marriage can be so affected by someone else’s that they feel they have to campaign against it (it doesn’t say much for the foundation of their marriage really, does it?).  To be honest I think that Holland has it about right.  If you want to get married you go to the town hall and get married.  If you want a church wedding you can do that too.  After the town hall.  And as an aside if you can’t afford it they even have days where it’s free!

And in a town hall you can have same sex marriages.  So my changing gender should not be an issue (OK, getting the certificate changed is still something that I have to try, we’ll see if it’s really an issue once I have the town hall information changed).

But…  It is in the UK – I just read that as long as you are married that they would not give you the certificate, even though I live in a country where it doesn’t matter. How ridiculous is that?

So…  I guess I am going to have a choice.  Get divorced for the certificate or live without it.

As I never intend to live in the UK again I think I know which way that decision is likely to fall. 


  1. Tell me about it!

    The churches do not want same sex marriage but because they keep getting in the way of reasonable legislation to allow "couples" to have equality in their legal unions I am actually obliged to be in just such a marriage as they hate!

    If the legislation changed people like us could get our gender registration certificates which would allow us to change birth certificates but not until they decide to be reasonable human beings.

    It is all a bit ironic when you know that there are people who have changed all their documentation but ave not gone through the physical changes...

    1. I just don't get why they don't simply make the changes for civil ceremonies and leave the churches to do what they want...

      Sometimes I wish there wasn't the irony...


  2. Some parts of the church seem to be forward thinking and accepting. I think it was the BBC who ran a piece on the Quakers, who said they had no issue with marriage for all and then they added that no-one should be forced to provide that service. How dare they be so damned reasonable about it all ;-)

    Sadly, there seems a louder portion of backwater twits - yeah, I'm sitting on the fence again - who seem to want to maintain the status quo based on a book that's been changed many times over the years. It's a poor do, IMO.

    Good luck with the paperwork, though. Forms, they drive you nuts.

    1. OK... I was being stereotypical! But, take the major religions in the country and I think that you have about that point of view :)

      Hopefully I'll get the envelopes this weekend and send it off!