Monday 6 December 2010

12 Months

12 months ago today I turned my life upside down - I had a the start of an anxiety attack and everything came flooding out to Mrs Stace.  This time last year I was expecting to spend this Christmas alone...

I was going to do a reflection on the last 12 months, and started to write it on the train.  I will (probably) finish it - but it has turned into quite a personal reflection and I will probably keep it to myself...

So instead I will go with this...  12 months on from thinking I had destroyed my life I spent this evening drinking Sherry, eating home made mince pies (Delia's mince meat and my mum's pastry recipe), putting up a tree and listening to Christmas music.  All with the wonderful company of Mrs Stace.

And even with the unknown's ahead, feeling much better than this time last year.  But then I am always happy after putting up the tree :)

13 comments:

  1. If you are experiencing anything like me you are an even nicer person to be with than you were before and let's face it they loved the miserably folk we were before!

    Great it is going so well, my tree is still growing in the garden covered in snow!

    Caroline xxx

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  2. Stace
    So happy for you - I was exactly the same last year wondering what a strange year it had been. We're putting the tree up next week and it is a special time of the year when the penguin goes on top of the tree.

    All my best to Mrs Stace and to the many xmas still to come together.

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  3. Wot!? There are no penguins at the north pole!

    Caroline xxx

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  4. Yes - but no fairies either as far as I'm aware!

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  5. I'm so glad that your year has turned out much better than you imagined. I'll skip on the mincemeat though. :)

    Karen, I love the idea of a penguin on top of the tree! We have a rather nice Father Christmas (no angels for us), and penguin ornaments (we love penguins), but one on top would be great. I saw a picture of an outdoor tree from the coast of Maine. They had put a big lobster on top.

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  6. Caroline: The only thing I can say there is that I am more relaxed around people who know.

    Karen: I love the idea of a penguin at the top of the tree!

    And all the best to your family!

    Ariel: How can you skip the mincemeat! :)

    Stace

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  7. Does our sister in Canada know what we mean by mincemeat? We are divided by a common language after all.

    Now I have a yearning for a mincemeat tart, lower proportion of pastry, yum.

    Caroline xxx

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  8. I was wondering that myself :)

    For clarity... It has no meat in it. It's apples, almond slivers, raisons, sultanas, currents, orange juice, lemon juice, butter (should be suet - but you can't buy that here) sugar, mixed spice, cinamon, nutmeg and brandy (IIRC).

    Slowly cooked for 3 hours to all melt together. Leave to cool (at this point the brandy is added as a presevative) and store in air tight containers in the fridge.

    Backed in a pastry case (8oz (+/-200g) sieved flour to 6oz (+/-150g) room temperature butter that you mix by hand).

    Serve warm with Brandy Creme or Brandy Butter (that I have yet to make this year) or simply dusted with icing sugar. Lovely!

    Stace

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  9. We know what mincemeat is, darlings. :) They even know in the Colonies.

    I think it's the particular spice mix that doesn't work for me.

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  10. ...feeling much better than this time last year

    Yay! There's that if nothing else. The future can be a little scary, but whatever happens, good luck whichever route you decide to go down.

    Lynn
    x

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  11. Has it really only been 12 months? Seems like a year at least. You've come so far in such a short time, Stace. Who says panic attacks can't better our lives?

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  12. Ariel: ;p Just checking. I have lots of Dutch friends who were scared of them in the beginning as they ahd no idea what was in them... (Then again they eat "oil balls" - literal translation, a type of ball doughnut basically - for new year...)

    Lynn: Definately 'Yay!' for that :) Things are difficult, and I can get quite down - but it's distinctly better than 12 months ago!

    Leslie: lol :) I'm in two minds about how far I have come. On the one hand it almost feels as if I have stood still. Then my therapist makes me recount what has changed in 12 months and, wow, it is quite an amount :)

    Panic attacks have improved my life - but only after I started listening to them :)

    Stace

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  13. I'm so glad things have worked out for you so well, Stace. Here's hoping the same or even better in 2011.

    Calie xxx

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