Good morning all, time to start another week!!!
Well after weeks of feeling down, depressed and tired as hell I'm finally feeling like I'm getting back.
Seems like a long time since I've been this settled - and I think that it was a lot of things starting to pile on top of each other.
Firstly the whole 'crossdressing' weight on my mind was getting to me. A discussion with my other half (as discussed in an earlier post) helped a lot here, and a discussion with a friend settled me too. He's the only person who I told how I was felling in my head (though I did not say why...) and he came up with a couple of idea's as he has been going through similar issues - with his head, not with dressing - and has some experience.
1) See someone professional - he said that he could see the issues I was having for a few weeks and need to sort it before it gets too much. Not quite ready for that yet, but never say never.
2) He gave me a diary - just to write down what is in my head when I need to. Just get everything out and on paper. I did this on the train going home last week. Started off not knowing what to do, ended up writing three pages of the most personal stuff in my head and before I knew it I was nearly at the other end.
The diary has *really* cleared my head. I slept for the first time in weeks that night without waking up until the alarm went off. And it's stayed that way since. Can definately recomend it if you are going through a rough patch... I now keep it with me at all times. Only problem is that I'm terrified that someone is going to find it. It's not quite as annonymous as this blog is with it being in my possession at all times :)
The other big thing that happened recently is my dad, who's only 59, had a heart attack about 6 weeks ago. That completely knocked me for 6. That fact that I left the UK a decade ago and he's over 1000 miles away doesn't help either.
But he's now had surgery and is recovering very well. That's a big weight lifted off of my shoulders as well. Can't wait to see my folks again the next time they come over.
So time to start another weeks work, let's see if the good attitude continues.
PS: Wayhay!!! My first follower Lynn! Thanks - for the comment too. I was wondering whether to remove the techy bit from the blog, but I think I'll leave it in. It may even appear later this week :)